Notes from a podcast interviewing Robert Iger
While I respect Iger’s mind, the podcast was not strong (felt the interviewer was ill prepared and the conversation was not original, so not leaving much here from what I listened to and will not leave link)
Notes from Shane Parrish’s Farnam Street’s Knowledge Project Podcast Episode 60 ft. Jim Dethmer (coach, speaker, author, and founding partner of The Conscious Leadership Group)
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Acting out from below or above the line.
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Can I accept myself for being reactive?
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Order of states: acceptance follows awareness
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Self-awareness in his words: creating a feedback rich environment/ or developing feedback rich tools for self-reflections
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‘If you are constantly getting feedback you are on a rocket-ship to self-awareness
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Constructive Self-acceptance
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Susan’s view: Centering on God’s delight in you, regardless of your state of being, mistakes, or how you acted. That you can accept and just strive to be better.
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Dethmer’s view: Being present with “I am okay just the way I am” Kill the belief that something at the core is missing.
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Jim Dethmer calls this level the “zone of genius” – what it is that lights me up to do in the world
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When work can start to lookalike play
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Ex.) Dethmer’s: “When I am coding, it is like a child at play. I love it.”
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Ex.) Susan’s “When I am designing or making new products, it is like a child at play. I love it. When I’m creating or solving something challenging, I get a huge adrenaline rush.”
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The sooner you return to PLAY, the better for best leadership or results or work
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the love of the thing
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Ex.) Dethmer’s “I LOVE LANDSCAPING!!”
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Ex.) Susan’s “I LOVE MY CUSTOMERS I LOVE SEEING ATEM IN MORE PLACES I LOVE PEOPLE GETTING HAPPIER FROM ATEM AND COMING BACK FOR MORE!”
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On desiring approval: “The core of this motivation too lies in fear”
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Definition: agreeing with oneself or with 2 people+ to do something.
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What does it mean to make clear agreements (commitments)?
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Agreements need to be incredibly clear.
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Not, let’s plan to meet around noon/in the morning, but let’s meet at x at y for z and we’ll do r, t, and c.
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Who, what, when
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Only make agreements you have a whole bodied agreement to
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Wholebodied agreements: When it’s a yes from you in mind, body, and heart.
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If you don’t do this, you make agreements you don’t want to make
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This includes little details even with things like times that are less convenient for you. Either be whole bodied agreeing in compromise, or say “if we could do it at 7:30 that would be better for me”.
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Most organizations keep between 40-60% of agreements
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How impeccable I am about making and keeping my agreements
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How impeccable I am about renegotiating agreements before I break them OR if I break them, cleaning them up
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If you break an agreement, immediately acting: “Before we go on I want to say sorry for being xyzzy. I was to see if there is anything I can do to make it up for you.”
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Taking acts of responsibility is the commodity of trust.
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High integrity people will meet this 90% of the time
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Being emotionally literate: Capable of knowing what you yourself are feeling, when you are feeling it. (Susan: I struggle with this, and naming my feelings and the why in the “present”).
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Something people often do, thinking it’s their feeling “I feel you are wrong” “I feel overwhelmed” – A thought followed by a feeling is not a feeling.
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Dethmer: Statistics support that feelings last less than 90 seconds if one doesn’t feed the feelings.
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Identify your feedback filters
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This person needs to give me feedback by this deadline, I need experts in the subject matter, this person isn’t smart enough” etc etc
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Dethmer: your state of mind should be about “I want feedback given any day, any time, by anybody
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Being thoughtful about your feedback filters and being conscious about which ones you want or decide to keep
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When asking for feedback, ensure the other person if they are concerned abut reputation or junior; “don’t worry about being right, constructive, or giving actionable feedback” “Anything I did less than 10, tell me what I can do better.” “Anything I did better than 1, tell me what I can do better.”
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Susan: Things I can do: Ask family “What is one thing I can do to be a better sister?” “What is one thing I can do to be a better daughter?”
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When receiving or getting feedback, always, ALWAYS ASK: “How is their feedback about me true about me? (Feedback is based off their projection of you or your work, but how is it true?
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When you give feedback or give out a projection of another, take that feedback of yourself in and see how it is true about you.