“I receive your mercy”
I woke up with a heart of anxiety today, and that quickly led to dread.
Dread for all the things that could happen, dread as I replayed and overthought speculations and events whose residues laid like weights on my heart over and over again in the span of an hour.
That’s how I started my morning, until I decided I don’t want any more of my day to be wasted in worry: for things that haven’t even happened, for the things I did or how I was , but couldn’t have done or been any more better.
In this moment, I decided to lay that all down to God. I said some prayers inside, asking God in my internal dialogue, “help me turn this around.
I then continued to go about my morning to dos before settling down for the day’s start: making a plant based smoothie, boiling water for a cup of green tea, and taking my medication and supplements.
A lyric line from a song, “I’ll Give Thanks” by Housefires popped up in my head: “God’s not worried so why do I worry?” Posed as a question, but sung like a battle cry– an anthem of sorts.
"In the morning you sing over me, I receive your mercy.
Your faithfulness is clear to see,
constant every day."
You know just what I need.
Also, here’s some savvy words with similar premise from Marcus Aurelius in Meditations, should anyone reading this prefer a secular text:
“that there is but a certain limit of time appointed unto thee, which if thou shalt not make use of to calm and allay the many distempers of thy soul, it will pass away and thou with it, and never after return.”
P.S. I am increasingly growing to understand that the praise and worship songs we were called to sing to adore you was made to really just preserve us. *chuckle* how little minded we are to think you need our praise, to think we do more things in service for your glory. I cannot help, but still and marvel.
"Every breath I breathe is an invitation to believe
that you are creating something good."
- Housefires, I'll Give Thanks