“Dominique Voillaume never tried to impress anybody, never wondered if his life was useful, or his witness meaningful. He never felt he had to do something great for God.”
In his last journal entry:
“All that is not the love of God has no meaning for me. I can truthfully say that I have no interest in anything but the love of God which is in Jesus Christ. If God wants it to, my life will bear fruit through prayers and sacrifices. But the usefulness of my life is his concern, not mine. It would be indecent of me to worry about that.”
I’ve been experiencing anxiety as an entrepreneur this past month with the stress from needing to (“wanting to”) have ATEM survive and thrive, especially during a collective period of societal, financial and economic upheaval bubbling again.
All manners of questions enter my head when I get anxious about work:
Questions like, “Is what I am doing meaningful?” “Are some projects I’m pursuing really helping anyone at all?” “Will this will get through to 2021 well?” “Do I need to be promoting myself more like all the other brands to compete even if I’m really uncomfortable with certain elements of the way beauty brands market or advertise their products?” “How do I take care of my growing team (and protect and nurture their livelihoods (financial, emotional, and mental) as a leader? How do I motivate them when we’re working cross-continentally and remotely?” “I want be a good boss. I don’t want to fail them.” “I ought to get more feedback on certain products/systems of the work I’m doing. But I’m afraid of what I’ll hear.” “How am I going to delegate responsibilities wisely with so many moving parts and with so many domains, some of which I have little experience with?”
As I continued to praise God and pray and meditate on the word of God this month, those questions, feelings of uncertainty and insecurity, and doubts that bubbled up began to simmer down again.
This week, I was back to a very good place again in my mental and emotional states (confidence, super management of incoming stress (processing it, but not letting it stay), joy in my work) as a young leader and entrepreneur.
And as I continue again to pray and meditate on the word of God, this passage reminds me of the things that matter in my work. All the things I worry and have worried about are distractions for the thing I profess I truly seek. And that is my love for God. My love for God ought to drive me to do what I do and to act how I act, and the fruits would be a reflection of this love. If that is true, then all the things that fall into place, regardless of whether they look like he way I envision it or don’t will be, right and good with God. And that means it ought to be right and good with me. Which basically eliminates my need to worry, especially all the things I worry about that are entirely out of my control.
I… pray I can grow to truthfully say this (the love of God) is all I seek.
I start this work day with renewed hope, clarity, and heart.
Also, TGIF :).
Also some lines that resonated with me or revisited my mind this morning:
“There’ll be a season for joy and weeping, in everything our God is faithful”:
Hurry is the devil:
“Hurry is not of the devil; hurry is the devil.” – Carl Jung
What I Say Is My Victory:
“Show me one thing He can’t do
Show me a mountain He can’t move
He’s the God of the breakthrough
And anything is possible, hey
Show me one thing that’s too hard
Show me waters He can’t part
He’s the God of the breakthrough
And anything is possible, is possible, hey”
I hope these remind you of just how good and faithful and wonderful our God is, and to proactively banish any false truths orbiting us, waiting to invade our thoughts and hearts and usurp our rightful seat in joy.